With the Christmas season upon us, I am truly enjoying a holiday. Rest and activity, family and friends, fun and games, in short, a good time. It is exactly what I like our Christmas holiday to look like. I am loving it! Holidays don’t always turn out like this one. In fact, have you ever had a holiday where you felt that you needed a holiday from the holiday? This past fall, I experienced such a holiday, one that I won’t forget.
The trip started pleasantly, with a friend and me taking a road trip to visit the horse farms in Kentucky. With my family connections, doors were opened to allow us to get an intimate feel of the thoroughbred horse world, a world both unique and interesting. We were having a great time. That is, until my friend fell down stairs and broke a leg and both wrists. Yikes! Fun and games were over, replaced by care and service. As my friend was not able to feed or clean herself, walk or inject herself with the anticoagulant drugs, I was enlisted. Our tour was irrevocably changed. I was no longer a tourist but a care giver….untrained, unaware of what would be required and unprepared. How did this 
happen?
Never the less, I was drafted and for the next four days, was number one care giver to my disabled charge, transporting her 1600 km. by car to a hospital in the Ottawa Valley. It was during this time that a profound respect for professional care givers was birthed. Care giving is both physically and mentally challenging, I learned, not to mention the weight of responsibility it bears along with care giving being a selfless act. But for the accident, I could not have known this! People who choose this path are superhuman in my mind and although I now know that I have it in me to be a care giver, I am grateful that for the moment, life is not calling upon me to be one.
There were other gains from the accident. I saw firsthand what family support is all about. Having declared my independence years ago by moving to Canada, I have never known of family support. Now, I know. It is wonderful! I appreciate the care, concern, compassion and support that my family gave us. They were remarkable, going above and beyond for me and for a stranger, simply because she was my friend. For the first time in 30 years, I found myself thinking that maybe someday my sweetie and I might move back to Kentucky to be closer to my family. 
I also saw how to be a pleasant patient. Even in her broken condition, I credit my friend for being charming, upbeat and positive during the whole ordeal. She is a model for me on how to be a good patient.
Another revelation was how I respond to a friend in need. I am happy to say that I was there, on the job 100%. My adrenaline was running and I rose to the task at hand. I didn’t come unseamed in a time of need. I held it together for the duration and waited to crash when I was in the safety of my own home. I feel good about how I responded and how do we know what we’ll do until we are put to the test?
The most important gain, however, of the entire holiday was reconnecting with one of my sisters. Time, distance and busyness have intervened for many years keeping us apart. Our visit enabled me to become reacquainted with my sister’s humor, one day doubling over from laughing so hard. I saw her craziness (just like mine), her love of life, her giant heart and her depth. We confided in each other as two people who trust each other implicitly do. I remembered how much I love my sister and value her dearly.
Since that fateful holiday, my sister has been diagnosed with cancer. She is to have surgery as soon as it can be scheduled followed by chemo and radiation. It is radical and incurable. My generous, warm, fun, goofy sister is facing 2011 with the battle of her life. Spending the days with this sister has become the highlight of this holiday. I am extremely grateful to have had this opportunity, and it is my hope that somewhere along the way in her battle that I have the honor of being a care-giver to her. I now have skills.
Do I regret this holiday that I need a holiday from? On the contrary, so much has been gained. Much is revealed in a time of trauma, much is learned and the fabric of life is filled with life lessons. Life lessons, the most valuable lessons of all.
Until then
If you have read this blog this far, perhaps you’ll continue on and join me in my prayer for my precious sister. Thank you.
May the Christ Light that shines forth surround, infuse and nurture Carol’s heart. May she know that she is loved deeply by God, family and friends because as the diamond reflects the light, Carol reflects the Christ light. May she draw from this love and light to be healed.
Please God be gentle with her.